How broken should one be over his or her sin? How long should that process take? Does it depend on the sin? I know God can use me after I have sinned but does God ever draw the line and say ok I have had enough? Will he then remove me from the earth when I have brought such shame to his name time and time again? I feel forgiven. I am forgiven. But I feel like I should grieve more over my sin but at the same time I am so ready for God to renew me, meet me again, and continue to use me. I know God makes all things new and his mercies are new every morning but has he really forgotten about what happened last night? Can he really raise me up above that sin? What about the one/ones who witnessed or participated in my sin? My witness surely has been ruined with them but can God still use me to touch their lives? I want him to. I want to have the intimacy and fellowship with God I once knew. Everyday I have to refeul and start over again with God. I know I am growing but everytime I take one step forward I take three steps backwards. God Help me to break through this world. God I cannot fight it off on my own, for when I try to stand up against it alone the world always wins. LORD I need YOUR strength, your wisdom, your power, and most of all your love to make up for where it is missing. God I am sorry for how I have hurt you. God you can find glory even in my despair. Come and make beauty from my ashes and my pain Lord. I am abandoning my sinful ways God (Thank you for your patience with me..) and I want to live an unashamed life ONLY FOR YOU! Empty me of me Lord so I can be filled with you.
